Omg so what age are you supposed to have your life together? … I’m asking for a mate.
I’m in my twenties and seem to be having an existential crisis nearly every day, mainly because my life isn’t going as I expected. If you had asked young and naive Elle a couple of years ago how her life was going to go, I’m sure that she would have it all planned out. But that’s not quite what happened.
I’m at an age where one day I think to myself “You’re young. Do whatever the hell you want. Spend all your money. Go travel the world. Spend your house savings on that bag. Stay out all night if you want to. You’ll find your calling in life soon. You’re not supposed to have it all together yet.” And then there are days where I think to myself “You are a big woman to not have your life together, to have no stability, to have no direction, to have no plan, to still think it’s okay to go day by day.”
How do you reach the safe zone? Can someone teach me to find tranquility? Surely I’m not the only one in this position…
I have people around me who are just finishing uni and are finding their feet in the “real world”, I have people around me who have been in and out of job after job and haven’t found their calling yet, I have people around me who have made their stamp in their industry and are flourishing and I have people around me who are flourishing socially and with their relationships and building families. Where do I fit in? In who’s footsteps am I supposed to follow? What if I’m not supposed to follow anyone’s footsteps at all? Why is there not a book called “How to be an adult”?
Why the hell do they ask “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” in job interviews? Nobody can predict that. It’s a trick question. You can hope, dream, fantasise, wish and plan all you like, but sometimes life just doesn’t work out that way. Well… I’ve decided to be a bloody badass and scrap the 5 year plan and go for monthly goals. I’ve been setting myself 2 goals a month since January, and already, this has aided me to learn a new language, try new foods, start new habits, quit the job I hated and form good relationships. And that’s all in the space of a couple of months.
I’m a lazy ass. I’m not setting myself up for failure with un-achievable goals, like save 5k in 1 month or lose 3 stone at the gym in 7 weeks (I actually haven’t been to gym in time … why am I still paying for a membership?) Set yourself small goals people. You may not become a well put together adult over night, but it’s a step in the right direction.
Basically … in short, I’m in the same boat as when I started. Still knowing fuck all about where I’m going or what I’m doing. However, I’m making small steps towards making myself a better and more cultured person in hopes that my calling will come to me.
If you thought this was going to be one of those self help blogs with a happy ending, you’re on the wrong blog babe.
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